I Liked Being Off The Grid

i turned off my cellphone on friday and didn't turn it back on until sunday on our way home. and in that time, my mom left me four voicemail messages--two on saturday and two on sunday. now i know there's gonna come a day when i won't be able to talk to my mom and i will regret it. i know it. i just wish it wasn't such a pain to tell her not to call every day. the truth is, my life is one big ball of dull.

in fact, unless i'm fired up about mr. perfect or cabbage patch head, i usually don't have a whole lot to say. speaking of those two, they spent the better part of an hour jacking their jaws. which is kinda strange considering those two are always blubbering about how busy they are. whatever.

back to phone calls. i know it would hurt her feelings to tell her that we don't need to talk every day. i don't know why, but it would. the thing is, i've got take advantage of our talks--just wish there was more to say. but she shuts me out of a lot of stuff. i have to hear about things like her oesteroposis shots and her staying at her school district from my sister. i'm like the last one to know about anything, which is weird because i'm the only kid left living in town.

but that's the way it's always been. she's always had this incredible relationship with my sister, who is exactly like her. maybe that's why they are such good friends and i'm like the third wheel. it never gets easier i can tell you that. my mom and i have shields a thousand feet thick. mostly because we've hurt each other.

and it was nice, really nice to be what felt like out of cell phone range. which i wasn't. but that didn't change the fact that i felt like i was not reachable. and i liked it. a lot.